You have to wonder who designs biking wear. One thing I could never understand was why they put drawstrings in cycling shorts. Drawstrings are a losing proposition. One trip to the washing machine, and you have one end that approximately two feet long and the other end is about two inches long. If you're lucky. If you're not lucky, one end will have disappeared into the recesses of the waistband. I hate to tell you how many hours I've wasted trying to recover one of these errant strings. The need for a drawstring on Lycra shorts isn't all that apparent anyway. They're unlikely to fall down. In fact, when you put on your skin tight Lycra shorts and snug up your drawstring you feel just like a sausage casing. This must be a vestige of the woolly shorts days (which really would fall down) that somehow never managed to disappear.
One thing that has disappeared from cycling shorts is pockets. I've got an old pair of wool shorts that actually has an outside pocket. This fell out of fashion sometime in the late seventies when aerodynamics were invented, and they started sewing the pockets on the inside. Now I would hesitate to put anything I really cared about in that close proximity to my sweaty, smelly bum, but it's the thought that counts. Still, even those disappeared in the continuing quest for aerodynamic shapes. I seriously doubt that wind tunnel tests would prove a significant advantage to the elimination of this miniscule pocket in comparison to the rest of my massive buttucks, but who am I to question the experts.
I was happy to see the last of the real chamois shorts liners. I'm sure there are legions of retro riders who take pride in maintaining and caressing their chamois, but the pairs I had always ended up like cardboard with a sandpaper veneer. The only way they became soft was to ride around with them for a while exuding all sorts of unpleasant bodily fluids on them. Of course, the only way to keep them soft was to never take them off, which of course is party time for all the microbes in the world. Good riddance to bad chamois -- use it to wash your bike.
Jerseys don't seem to have the problem of pocket phobia. This is where all the pockets went when they were exorcised from shorts. It's amazing how much you can stuff into those pockets. Of course, aerodynamics goes out the window when you're sporting your lunch, several extra layers, keys, wallet, etc all stuffed into three jersey pockets.
I've always been puzzled by people wearing jerseys of professional racing teams. I should think this could cause a lot of confusion in the peleton, but I guess the chances of the wearers being in the pack with Miguel Indurain are pretty slim. Still, I had quite a few Big Mig sightings a few years ago when everyone started wearing Banesto jerseys (the biking equivalent of Elvis sightings). In addition to the ones that provide free advertising that you have to pay for, there's a real plethora of jersey designs these days. I used to think I was pretty natty when I had one with three different colors (on purpose), but my humble fashion statements have been far eclipsed by these modern designer jerseys.
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