I’m thinking I might need a personal trainer.I used to think this was just for movie stars, but now ordinary people seem to having personal trainers, just like they have accountants. I'll bet my mailman has a personal trainer. Now, the next question is why I'd need to resort to this measure. My cycling has been stagnating lo these twenty years. I've reached a plateau of mediocrity from which I've started a slow decline. It's getting harder and harder to keep up with the twenty-somethings. So my personal trainer could whip me into a lean, mean cycling machine, and I could blow the doors right off those grandmas on Huffies.
On the other hand, dealing with a personal trainer could be downright demoralizing. He would probably be a strapping young lad with biceps the size of my leg. Now if the trainer were a strapping young wench... It would still be demoralizing, but at least it might be more interesting. Maybe Jane Fonda's not busy.
My current training regimen involves eating a lot of food, most of it bad for me. Right now my major decision is whether to go with the filled or chocolate covered doughnut. I suspect my PT would opt for "none of the above." I would have to start eating healthy things, like fruit and vegetables (banana daiquiris don't count). I might even have to start eating dreaded "energy food."
I suppose I would have to worry about "quality mileage," as opposed to my usual garden variety mileage. I'd have to learn about things like LSD (not the Timothy Leary variety), wind sprints (more like winded sprints), fartlek (not what you're thinking), all manner of unpleasant things. I'd have to monitor my heart rate more closely than a patient in the ICU.
On the other hand, maybe I'll just content myself with slipping into bicycling mediocrity. Think I'll have another beer to go with that doughnut.
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